2004-09-26
They say WWJD, I'm inclined to say WTF?!
Just a hint of regret. Wish that I had pushed harder. Wish that I didn't let go of that dream. Wish that I hadn't been so damn lazy.
Then again, it might be the big man upstairs steering me along the path He wants me to take. I don't know. Maybe it's just an excuse that Christians make for their poor decision-making, laziness, apathy etc. Who knows? It's not just Christians, though. People of all sorts of religious persuasion just let go to faith and maybe even fate. Maybe I have something to learn.
I'm not bitter, though. I just need to get rid of that knot in my stomach. I'm tired of being berated for my choices. They're not that easy to make, you know? I just want to be calm and happy. I want to find my centre and not waver. I want to do honourable things that bring more light to the world. Why do certain people have to bring me down and stop me from doing those things?
Sigh.
hazel at 10:34 p.m.
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